


Knights of Desire

by ineedthislikeaholeinthehead



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angst, Blow Jobs, F/M, Frottage, Hand Jobs, Hate fucking, M/M, Masturbation, Merlin gets ridden like the town bicycle, Oral Sex, Rimming, Semi-Public Sex, Threesome - M/M/M, Voyeurism, magical lube
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-10
Updated: 2016-06-29
Packaged: 2018-05-25 23:38:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 11,531
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6214723
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ineedthislikeaholeinthehead/pseuds/ineedthislikeaholeinthehead
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Merlin longs for King Arthur, but since he knows he will never have him, there is no reason he shouldn't have some fun.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Sir Lancelot

**Author's Note:**

> First things first: First Merlin story. No Beta.
> 
> I was listening to this song, Blood and Fire, and there's this line, "My nights of desire are pulling me here, back to your fold." And for some reason I read it in my head "Knights of desire" and then I couldn't get it out of my head, so here is 10K of Merlin filth so it's no longer in my head.

It wasn’t something Merlin would have looked for. He reminded himself of that every time he snuck out of the castle, hid in the shadows of the town below, and slipped through the gates into the surrounding forest. It was just something that had sort of happened. A completely unexpected connection between two people, forged by a confession Merlin had, at first, regretted. 

There was no need to regret it though, because the man he’d admitted his secret to was kind and true and understood completely the concept of confidential information. After all, he held his own secrets in his heart. 

As Merlin approached their usual meeting place, his heart beat faster, seeing the silhouette of a broad shouldered man. He turned, took the hood from his cape down, and smiled. No one could feel sad when Lancelot smiled on them, especially not Merlin. 

As he moved closer, Lancelot greeted him with a hearty hug and a soft kiss. 

“It has been far too long, my friend.” He said, and Merlin agreed with a nod. “Tell me if you’ve missed me.” 

“I’ve missed you more than anything.” He admitted. And it wasn’t true. But it sounded nice.

“Same as I’ve missed you.” And this wasn’t true either. There was a special place in each man’s heart for the other, but both held a higher space for people that they could never have. 

Lancelot started to sit on the wet ground, Merlin stopped him, showing him the heavy blanket under his arm. Lancelot laughed. 

“You always think of everything.” He told Merlin while grabbing two corners of the blanket and helping him lay it down. Merlin blushed at the compliment. He had a problem with blushing around Lancelot. He wasn’t the only one. 

When they had finished unfurling the blanket, Lancelot sat down, then looked up at Merlin. 

“Aren’t you going to join me?” He asked, and those lips and that smile were too much to say no to if he had wanted to, and he had never felt the need or want to say no to Lancelot. 

They sat, talking of the happenings of court and of the wider world that Lancelot was now a part of. Merlin pretended not to notice the way his eyes lit up any time Gwen was mentioned, and Lancelot was polite enough not to make mention of how long Merlin could go on and on about Arthur. 

As the minutes passed, they both moved closer in towards each other. They could say it was for protection from the wind, that they were cold. But they craved each other’s body heat for a much less innocent reason, and while neither of them would ever say it out loud, these last moments of their visits were the ones they always looked forward to the most. 

Lancelot always made the first overt move. He had always been brave, and there was no reason for him not to be, Merlin of all people had no reason to rebuff him.

He kissed down Merlin’s neck to the very tiny triangle of his chest made visible when his scarf was unraveled. Merlin never took off his shirt in Lancelot’s presence, it was too cold in the woods in the dark when they met, and even if it wasn’t, the thought of someone like Lancelot having to gaze on his too pale skin, his too frail frame was reason enough to keep it on. 

It didn’t stop Lancelot from looking anyways. pulling up the shirt to plant kisses along the line of his beautiful stomach. Merlin couldn’t understand anyone thinking he was beautiful, but when he looked into Lancelot’s eyes, there was no doubt that he felt it. 

Lancelot moved his fingers along the line of Merlin’s trousers, and before he could comprehend what was happening, they were slung low on his thighs and his prick was in Lancelot’s mouth. It was Merlin who was practically gagging though, so unexpected was the sensation of his tongue along the backside of his shaft, his lips wrapped tightly around Merlin’s base, the way his tip occasionally brushed against the knight’s tonsils.

He didn’t have much time to take in these sensations before Lancelot’s hands were cupping his balls, then moving lower until they found Merlin’s ass, slowly moving between his cheeks. It was over before he had a chance to get even a finger remotely close to his hole. Merlin was glad they were surrounded by darkness, because he would hate to have to look Lancelot in the eyes after he’d grabbed his hair so tight while spilling down his throat. 

Lancelot looked up, wiping his lips, but smiling under his fingers, and in an instant, Merlin knew everything was forgiven, if it had ever been a trespass to begin with. As he moved back onto the blanket, Merlin pulled up his trousers and righted himself before turning towards the beautiful man, wracking his brain to figure how he could repay the gift Lancelot had just given him, knowing he was nowhere near as skilled. 

Lancelot pulled Merlin in for a kiss. As soon as their lips had locked, a rustle from the trees startled them both. When it was finished, they laughed at their nerves. They’d found this place months ago, and knew that no one else could. But as their lips met again, the rustle came back. Each time, louder, more startling. 

“I think our time is just about up for tonight.” Lancelot said. 

“No. I can do something about this.” Merlin said, wracking his brain for a cloaking spell, an invisibility spell. Anything.

“Anything you could do would drain your energy. And I would want you at full capacity if I were to have you at all.” He said. Then, with a kiss, Lancelot stood up, and stretched out his hand towards Merlin, who took it, and squeezed hard as he pulled himself up. Lancelot gave him one more kiss, more romantic than he was expecting, he would have swooned if he hadn’t known it was really meant for Gwen, and smiled before he turned to go off. 

“Will you send word for me?” Merlin asked. 

“As soon as I can find a way back through these parts.” 

“Will you think of me?” 

“As often as you think of me, Merlin.” He said, turning back to smile at him once more before disappearing into the woods.


	2. Sir Percival and Sir Elyan

“Merlin!” Merlin was used to people screaming his name. He could tell so much simply by listening to the way two syllables fell off some one’s tongue. This time, it was only Gauis’ everyday call, so was (for once) not in any trouble and he happily walked out of his sleeping area and towards Gauis’ work station. 

Gauis was busy reading something, Merlin didn’t care to peak at what, and couldn’t be bothered to turn around and greet him properly.

“Percival has a sprained shoulder.”

“How terrible for him.”

“Indeed.” Gauis handed him a glass bottle. “Go and give him this.” Merlin turned the bottle over in his hands.

“What is it?”

“It’s just olive oil. But don’t tell him that.”

“Why not?”

“Because there’s nothing I can do for him, but if he thinks he’s getting treatment he’ll stop complaining and it will go away on its own.”

“Got it.” 

“Good.” Merlin stood there, looking at the olive oil and wondering if it had been taken from their food stores. “Well, go, Merlin.” Gauis told him, and he was off.

*******************************************

When he finally found Percival, he was in the armory with Elyan, slowly taking off the enormous pieces of armor surrounding his enormous body.

“Help me with this.” He said to Elyan, who was in the middle of unburdening himself of armor. 

“Get Merlin to do it.” He told Percival, who looked up, happily, at Merlin’s sudden arrival. 

“Merlin!” Most of the knights liked Merlin. Or, at least they weren’t as cruel to him as Arthur enjoyed being. He wasn’t exactly “one of the guys,” but they’d all been saved by his burgeoning physician talents at least once. Unbeknownst to them, the lot had been saved by him by his magic more than they could ever imagine. Even though they would never know all the things he had done for them...mostly for Arthur...Merlin liked to think the knights all saw him as something of a mascot. Which was better than a pet, at least. Anything was better than just a servant. “Do you have something for me?” Percival asked, hopefully. Merlin put the bottle down and walked over.

 

“Yeah. But first…” Percival bent down and Merlin swiftly pulled the metal off his shoulder. He marveled at the size of it. No one was immune to the hard lines and meaty power of Percival’s body, but Merlin looked up and caught eyes with Elyan, knowing instantly that he had been caught salivating a bit too obviously.

 

“What do you have for me?” He asked again, and Merlin handed the armor to Elyan, grabbed the bottle and handed it to Percival, who looked it over quixotically.

 

“Do I drink it?”

 

“Errr, no. It’s better if you rub it into the affected area.”

 

“Well, how am I supposed to do that? Both of my shoulders are killing me.”

 

“Maybe Merlin could rub it on you.” Elyan said, giving him a look that was one part wingman, one part tease.

 

“I wouldn’t want to overstep my boundaries. Elyan, perhaps you should do the honors.” Merlin said.

 

“No. I can have Elyan rub me down any time I want.” Merlin didn’t want to feel a twinge of jealousy while watching the smile that passed between the two, but he did. Not just because the sex between the two of them had to be absolutely phenomenal, but because he would never be able to flirt that openly with.. well, it wasn’t even right to say his name, was it? He would never be able to say something so obvious to anyone, least of all the person he’d been thinking of.

 

Percival handed him the bottle, smiled and turned around on the bench he’d sat down on so Merlin could reach his shoulders. Merlin popped open the bottle and poured some of the olive oil on his hands, gingerly touching the affected area. After a few minutes of this gentle treatment, Percival pushed back against Merlin’s chest.

 

“Come on, Merlin, put some strength in it.”

 

“I don’t think Merlin has any strength to spare.”

 

“Thank you for the vote of confidence, Elyan.” 

 

“Less quipping, more proving him wrong.” Percival requested, and Merlin gave it his best shot, which didn’t seem to impress him. He tried again. No reaction. This wasn’t fair. Sure, he was skinny, but he didn’t think that he was really this weak.

 

He moved his head down, so Elyan couldn’t see his eyes flash gold as he whispered under his breath and rubbed Percival’s shoulders with more force than he rightly had, causing Percival to immediately cry out, not in pain, but in intense, embarrassing pleasure. Merlin pulled his head back up and smiled in satisfaction. 

 

“Look at how proud he is.” Eylan said, walking closer to Merlin. Percival turned his head back quickly, hoping that if he didn’t call attention to how much Merlin had just affected him, they could ignore the aching in his loins.

 

Of course, this wasn’t the sort of opportunity that Elyan would ever let go to waste. He was standing right next to Merlin, whose hands had fallen from Percival’s shoulders.

 

“Come on.” He told Percival. “Turn around.” Percival was embarrassed, there was nothing wrong with being aroused. There was nothing wrong with being aroused by Merlin, who was tiny and cute and very much a nice person. But the fact that he was in this state in a semi-public space, with an audience, was just a little mortifying.

 

He didn’t like to disobey Elyan though. Elyan was also very much a nice person, and a giving person, and knew how to make Percival feel good, perhaps better than he did himself. So he did as he was told, turned around, and was rewarded, as always, with Elyan’s gleeful smile. He sat down next to Percival, and unceremoniously pulled out of his trousers the absolute biggest prick Merlin had ever seen. He took the bottle, and poured it over his hand.

 

“Don’t waste that! It’s for my shoulder.” Elyan licked it off his finger.

 

“Is this cooking oil?” He asked, Merlin looked away sheepishly and didn’t answer. Elyan started stroking Percival, who let out a stunted moan. “This is your fault, Merlin.”

 

“It doesn’t look like fault is the appropriate word to use in this situation.” Merlin said, trying to avert his eyes as Elyan continued to stroke. 

 

“Still, you caused it. It only seems fair that you should finish it.” 

 

“You look like you’re doing just fine without my assistance.”

 

“No, he’s not.” Percival said. And just when Merlin was thinking Percival was on his side.

 

“On your knees.” Elyan said, and Merlin was 100% sure that Elyan lacked mind control capabilities, but he felt compelled to do as he said regardless. With his free hand, he guided Merlin’s mouth to the quivering tip of Percival’s prick, and let him take his time. Elyan squeezed the shaft, and watched a drop of precum fall on Merlin’s tongue. This was enough encouragement, and Merlin wrapped his lips around the tip as Elyan continued to stroke. After a few minutes Elyan’s hand didn’t have any more room to move, so he released Percival’s prick to whatever Merlin would decide to do, and moved away, to give them room. 

 

Merlin and Percival were both too distracted to see Elyan grab the bottle as he moved back to watch the scene. Merlin barely registered that his trousers were being pulled down. It wasn’t until he felt one of Elyan’s fingers, newly slicked, sliding between his cheeks that he even realized how close the other knight was. It didn’t take very long for Elyan to work two fingers inside Merlin.

 

With Percival’s prick down his throat, and Elyan’s fingers up his arse, Merlin was the most full he’d ever felt, until Elyan pulled down his own trousers, pulled out his fingers, and tipped the bottle over Merlin’s open arse before slowly and patiently sliding inside him. 

 

Merlin nearly choked on Percival for how good Elyan felt, but he regained his composure quickly, bobbing his head up and down at the same rhythm as the thrusts he was taking from both of them. Percival came first, gushing hard and fast and absolutely filling Merlin’s mouth. It was only fair, Elyan and Merlin had been coaxing and playing with him much longer than they had been working themselves up. 

 

Elyan was determined to make Merlin come, but he wasn’t giving in to any angle or thrust that he had in his arsenal, so he elicited the help of his mate, giving Percival a series of nods and looks until he understood what he was being told to do. 

 

Elyan wrapped his arms around Merlin, bringing their chest and back together, and Percival slunk down to the floor, easily sliding Merlin’s prick into his mouth. Between Elyan’s thrusts and Percival’s tongue, they made quick work of him, and as he came in spurts over Percival's lips and the spasms Merlin was experiencing were just enough to pull Elyan over the edge. 

 

They collapsed in a heap on the floor. After a minute, sandwiched between to two knights, Merlin picked up the half empty bottle and shook it.

 

“How are your shoulders, Percival?” He asked.

 

“Much better, thanks.” He told him, his head still planted on Merlin’s chest.


	3. Sir Leon

Merlin was tired. He was tired of being bossed around by everyone in the castle. He was tired of being treated like a nobody. He was tired of being expected to shoulder the weight of the world with absolutely no recognition. And he was just plain tired. 

Unfortunately, things had to done regardless of his feelings. He’d been in the stables, ensuring that the new lot of horses for the king’s knights were up to his standards. He didn’t know how or why he was tasked with this. Merlin knew about as much about the standards of fighting horses as a stable hand, and if Arthur had wanted a stable hand to inspect the horses, he could have bloody well got one of his stable hands to do it. 

Apparently, Merlin had a gift for seeing things others didn't, though. Apparently, he should be happy that Arthur noticed that talent about him. But if that were true, it would be the first time Arthur had noticed anything about him, ever. And Merlin knew the king was still mad at him for an accident in the kitchen that had been almost entirely not his fault. He very much doubted that his “gifts” had anything to do with the fact that Arthur wanted Merlin spending the night in the stables the night before they were meant to be cleaned. 

Nevertheless, Merlin had done his due diligence, inspecting all the horses while he grumbled about how no one ever thought about him unless it was to give him more chores. As he was rounding the corner from the last of the stables, there was a torch on the stone. A torch he knew he hadn’t left there himself. He snuck into the room as quiet as a mouse, and when he turned the corner, the guards were gone, the rest of the torches were lit, and the table was filled with food. 

Leon was sitting at one of the chairs, taking a bite of a chicken leg. 

“What are you doing here?” Merlin asked. 

“Eating.” 

“I can see that… why here?” 

“Thought you might want some company.” 

“I’m not following you, Leon.” 

“Arthur’s being a right prat today, isn’t he?” 

“Don’t think he’d like it if he heard you say that.” 

“Doesn’t mean it isn’t true.” He looked up and smiled, which was contagious. Merlin sat down, took a drink of wine, hoping that it would help him from inhaling the food Leon had brought him. It didn’t. 

“Thank you.” He said when he was finished. “But why?” Leon shrugged. 

“You looked like you could use a break.” He said. 

“I’m not used to people noticing what I need.” Merlin admitted. 

“I’m sure they do. Everyone loves you, Merlin.” Merlin laughed. 

“Love isn’t the word I would use.” 

“It is appropriate, though.” 

“I assure you, ‘Everyone tries to stand you, Merlin.’ is much more appropriate.” Leon picked up a raisin and rolled it across his finger and his thumb, concentrating on that instead of looking up at Merlin. 

“Well, I love you at least.” He said. 

“You’re very kind, Leon.” 

“I don’t know about that. I bribed you with food so I could talk to you tonight.” 

“Well, you can talk to me like that any time you want!” Merlin said with a laugh. Then, it suddenly hit him what Leon had confessed. “You can talk to me without bribing me, too.” He told him. Leon tossed the raisin into his mouth and smiled. 

“I suppose… I’m lucky there, aren’t I?”

 

*******************************************

Merlin didn’t really know what to do with himself. The thought of a knight saying something like love to him was… he didn’t know what to think about it. Every time he caught Leon looking at him, there was a blush on his face, and Merlin could feel blood rushing to his own cheeks. 

And Leon was handsome. He was the most kind hearted person Merlin could think of, besides maybe Gwen. Every time they had an excuse to pass each other, Merlin and Leon would take it.   
Every time they had an excuse to be alone together, they would jump at the chance. 

Things went slowly with Leon. This was an experience that Merlin had never known, especially not from a knight. He liked them all just fine, but there had never been a possibility of anything real there before. For one thing, everything they were doing was punishable by death. It made everything more thrilling, but it was also put a grim damper on fantasizing about any sort of future together. Even if it hadn’t been expressly forbidden, Merlin knew he had no chance with them.

Elyan and Percival could play house with the king and the entire army turning a blind eye, but they were at least of the same stature in Camelot. Merlin was a nobody, surrounded by somebodies. He wasn’t an option for anyone. 

It didn’t seem to matter to Leon though. He wasn’t, of course, declaring his love on a pulpit or in the streets. He wasn’t reading anyone any poetry. But there was a whispered understanding between the rest of the knights to stop whatever games they’d been playing or thinking of playing with Merlin, and there was the occasional moment where a subtle touch or kiss would go unnoticed in a hall. Everyone seemed very happy for Merlin and Leon. 

Almost everyone. Merlin couldn’t understand it. Leon and Gwen were, to his eyes, the best of friends. They were the nicest people he knew, and he had always considered Gwen, if not a confidant, then at least an esteemed friend. But she hadn’t been very kind to him once she heard tell of his relationship with Leon. 

“You’re on shaky ground, Merlin.” She’d warned him when he’d come in to collect the breakfast plates once Arthur had left their room. 

“Beg Pardon, Your Highness.” 

“Oh, stop it. You’re teasing me and I’m trying to be serious.” 

“Sorry, Gwen. Tell me what I’m doing wrong.” 

“It’s not that you’re doing anything wrong, it’s just the rules don’t like what you are doing.” 

“You want to be specific? I seem to break a lot of rules.” 

“Leon.” The mention made Merlin’s heart flutter and his stomach clench at the same time.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” 

“You don’t think we talk? You don’t think the entire court sees the looks you pass each other all the time? You’re being too obvious, Merlin. And if you slip too much, you’re going to get the both of you in very big trouble.” 

“It’s a good thing I have friends in high places.” 

“It’s not about friends, Merlin. It’s about making sure we keep order.”

“And we all know mixing within the classes causes chaos, don’t we?”

“That was not the rule I was referring to.” She reminded him. He collected her dishes and walked out, hoping he wouldn’t bump into someone and accidentally spill his angry secrets. 

Which of course meant that he walked right into Gwaine. Literally walked into him, dropping all his dishes and knocking Gwaine to his arse in the process. 

“Sorry.” He said, offering his hand, in which Gwaine placed a plate while he laughed. 

“No problem. I always like being covered in the royal leftovers.” He told him, while standing up and helping Merlin pick up his dishes. “You look in a foul mood.” 

“Thank you so much for noticing.” Merlin started walking in the direction of the kitchen, Gwaine followed. 

“What’s wrong?” He asked. 

“Nothing important. Something the queen said put me off.” 

“The Queen?” Gwaine and Merlin had never bothered with Gwen’s title. Like kids who grow up with nicknames their peers just can’t shed, she would always be Gwen. 

“She was speaking as the queen, a royal edict especially for me.” 

“Which was?” They were at the kitchen door. Gwaine had special instructions not to go into the kitchen, which he blithely ignored as he followed Merlin in. 

“Don’t date Leon.” 

“Oh. That’s a stupid way to waste your royal edicts.” 

“That’s what I thought. Why does she care who I date? I never told her not to date Arthur.” Merlin had, on many occasions, told Gwen not to date Arthur. Sometimes, he had even had valid reasons. 

“You should tell Leon.” Merlin dumped the dishes. 

“What? No... I don’t want to bother him.” 

“You shouldn’t carry this by yourself, Merlin. He won’t know what’s wrong, and he’ll feel alienated, and then Gwen will get exactly what she inexplicably wants.” 

Merlin stood there for a long while, thinking about what Gwaine said, and trying very hard to think up a reason why he might be wrong. 

*******************************************

Dinner together had been wonderful. Merlin didn’t mind when people were around, but there was something about being alone together, an experience he and Leon hadn’t had very much of yet, that was absolutely intoxicating. 

Once the plates were put away, Leon went to the door and quickly locked it. 

“It locks from the inside. You can leave any time you want.” He said. 

“And if I don’t want to leave?” 

“Then I’ll be a very lucky man. Because no one is going to be back this way tonight.” Merlin moved closer to Leon, pulling him in for a kiss. 

“That makes us both very lucky.” He said, and then they erupted into a frenzy of kisses and caresses, weeks (months, perhaps years) of pent up attraction finally blossoming into a cacophony of wandering hands and mouths. In all his days, Merlin had never seen a man get undressed faster, nor take off his clothes so quickly either. Within seconds, they were gazing at each other’s bodies. Leon’s eyes were wide with fascination, and Merlin recognized that his were, too. He reached out to touch Leon’s prick, already swollen to full glory, and Leon began to kiss him as Merlin wrapped his fingers around it. 

His lips swept down Merlin’s cheek, his neck, his shoulder, and then Leon dragged his tongue across his collarbone, stopping to plant more kisses along the dip at his clavicle, wandering up to his adam’s apple, then back down and over until he reached Merlin’s other shoulder. Merlin was wont for words, enthralled by the soft way that Leon’s hands traced over every inch of his skin. He had never been touched so softly, so tenderly, and he didn’t know if he would know how to return the favor. 

When Leon’s hands finally met Merlin’s prick, it was still the same sweet caress he had treated the rest of Merlin’s body to. It was intoxicating, and in an instant, his hand was gone, grabbing Merlin’s own hand, the one around his prick. 

“Can I ask you to do something, Merlin?” Leon asked. 

“Of course.” 

“Sit here.” He said, motioning to his lap. “Face me.” Merlin did what was asked, his bum planted firmly on Leon’s knees, the inside of his thighs touching the outside of Leon’s. Leon wrapped his hands around Merlin, and scooted him closer, their pricks meeting, sending a shock up both their spines. Leon looked up at Merlin through lidded eyes, the wrapped his hand around both of them and started stroking. 

To see Leon’s face, to feel himself throbbing on Leon’s prick, was almost more than Merlin could handle. He bent down and kissed him, and couldn’t stop, because like this, they could see each other. Merlin hadn’t known it was possible to be this close, fell this much tenderness. He could feel Leon’s pleasure, or maybe he could just see it on his face, as it started, Merlin buried his face in Leon’s neck, feeling the warmth over his stomach and cascading into bliss right behind him. 

After cleaning up, they laid together, Leon’s arms wrapped round Merlin’s shoulders, for warmth perhaps, but really just because he wanted to be close. Merlin was sure that Leon wanted to be just as close as he did. He yawned. He would have to put on clothes and go back home soon, but he couldn’t just yet. 

“I knew that the queen was wrong about us.” 

“The Queen? What could she possibly have to say about you and I?”

“It’s stupid really. She just said that we were on shaky ground. Pushing the rules too much.” Leon hoped he wasn’t showing too much anger in his face. Merlin really was very good with picking up on those sorts of things. He hoped he wasn’t too distant when he responded. 

“She said that, did she?” 

“I don’t know where she gets off. There are much more obvious cases than us to worry about.” Merlin yawned again. “Course, she could just get her royal butt down to talk to her royal pratt of a husband and get those rules changed. She’d have to want to though.. wouldn’t she?” 

“Yes. Far be it from any of us to question why some of these rules haven’t been changed.” 

Merlin yawned again, and sat up. 

“I’m sorry Leon. I think I have to leave, otherwise I’ll be here all night, and we don’t want to push any more rules, do we?” He smiled. Leon’s smile was curt, but somehow, Merlin knew it wasn’t about him, stood up and started dressing. 

“Until tomorrow?” He asked as he unlatched the door. Merlin kissed him, just a peck on the lips. 

“Til then.” He said. As he walked back home, he felt confident (and a little bit annoyed) in doing as Gwaine suggested and telling Leon.

*******************************************

“Where do you get off?” Leon asked. Arthur was off on an excursion with only a handful of knights, and Leon had long since lost his qualms about barging into the royal bedchamber. 

Gwen was still in her nightclothes. It was early, but she was awake. 

“You, sir are the one storming into a lady’s bedroom. Demanding answers for a question I haven’t even heard.” 

“Merlin.” 

“What about him? Are you missing him now he’s away and you’re stuck here with me?” 

“I’m not stuck here with you, you asked for me to be your guard. Why do you threaten us?” 

“I did nothing of the sort. I merely reminded him of the laws of the kingdom.” 

“The same way you pull Percival aside every time he smiles and Elyan? The same way you remind Gwaine when he comes in stinking of mead and sweat? Or do you save all of your reminders for your husband?” 

“That is your KING you speak of.” 

“I mean no offense.” Was as much of an apology as Leon could muster. He took a deep breath. “You wanted this, Gwen.” He reminded her. She turned away. 

“No, I didn’t.” She said. He went to her. 

“You said it to me. You told me, get over me, Leon. Find someone new.” She still refused to look, and he pulled her face towards his. “You told me to forget about you…And I tried… But I couldn’t.” 

“You don’t understand, Leon. It’s not right.” 

“And yet, whatever Arthur wants…” 

“A king may have his trinkets, a queen must endure.” Leon stood up, as straight and hardened as he could, but being too weak to resist kissing the queen. He took a step back, towards the door, towards his post. 

“I promise to only ask you once, My Queen. Did you forget about me?” She stood up, took his hand in her face, and kissed him again. 

“Never.” She said. And then she pressed herself against his body, held tight while his arms wrapped around her, and whispered. “Never.” 

*******************************************

“Merlin, I have something to tell you.” Arthur was staring out the window. Merlin knew it was bad, he could tell by the vein bulging out of his neck. By this point, Merlin knew exactly what every movement in Arthur’s body meant. He didn’t need magic to read Arthur. Arthur was a book he knew cover to cover. 

“Yes, Sire.” 

“Leon has been moved to captain of the Queen’s Royal Guard.” He still hasn’t turned around. “So there will be no reason for you two to interact again.” Merlin swallowed. He’d been warned. He knew this could happen. He had to accept it, and he had to accept it quickly, because he could tell that whatever Arthur was really angry about would be exacerbated if Merlin did what he usually did and ran off his mouth. 

“I see, Sire.” Was all that he could choke out.

“That’s all, Merlin. You’re dismissed for the day.” 

“Are you sure there isn’t anything else you might need my help with?” 

“No. Enjoy the day off. “ Days off were few and far between. Merlin had been grateful on more than one occasion when an injury had made it impossible for him to perform his duties, and Arthur (and Gauis) had had to give him bedrest. It was the closest thing to a day off he ever got. And now, with a gracious wave of his hand, Arthur had blessed him with 10 or 12 glorious hours where he was his own man. Of course it would come on the one day of his life where he would give anything to be working until his knuckles bled. 

He turned around somberly, hoping that Gauis would be away so he could mourn the loss of Leon on his own. 

“Merlin.” Arthur said. Merlin turned back round, and Arthur turned around to look him straight in the eyes. “I am truly sorry.” And Merlin knew he wasn’t lying. It was one of the reasons he loved Arthur, the fact that he held so much compassion for everyone. Even him. 

*******************************************

They had never had much time to see each other. It had always been because they had wanted to before that Merlin and Leon were able to make it work. But now, with this new assignment, it was even harder, even if they had been trying. They’d both been thinking about it, but there was only so much that anyone could express in glances across crowded rooms that were barely milliseconds long. 

And in time, the hurt began to fade. The good times began to become memories to look back on, and the smiles they shared, when they could, became genuine again. 

It wasn’t until months later that they had a chance to speak. It was only a brief, chance encounter, but they took it all the same, standing in a hallway, no one around, or no one who would care around at least. 

“Long time.” Leon started, pressing his hand lightly around Merlin’s back in some form of a hug. 

“It seems that way.” 

“I…”

“You don’t have to explain. You love her, don’t you?” 

“It doesn’t mean I didn’t love you, Merlin.” 

“I know.” 

“Do you have any love in your heart for me?” 

“Always.” 

“Just not as much as for…” 

“It doesn’t matter, does it?”

“It doesn’t. I think we’re still good men, Merlin. We just have our eyes set on prizes too high.”

“Then maybe we deserve this.” Merlin laughed. “I wish you luck.” 

“You, too, friend.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No one cares, but this one made me cry. I'm really annoyed at myself for writing this one.


	4. Sir Mordred

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was looking forward to this chapter a ridiculous amount. If only to add the new tags.

Merlin hated parties. Rather, Merlin hated working at parties. There was always too much alcohol and never enough empathy and too many loud, rowdy voices, all cheering for him to entertain them. And they didn’t want any recitations or lively debates, of course. The coarser he could be, the better. It wasn’t Merlin’s scene at all. 

Yet, here he was again. And there was the weasly little Mordred, calling him over for another refill. Merlin grabbed the pitcher and sluggishly walked over. Mordred smiled when Merlin finally reached him. 

“You’ve made it!” He said, holding up his mug. “Past the perilous mountains.” He pointed towards Percival. “The terrifying thunder.” He pointed to Elyan. “And.” He looked at Gwaine. “The wild winds.” Everyone erupted like the little prat had just made most clever joke in the world. Merlin took his cup, filled it and walked away in silence while everyone hooted and hollered at him. 

He missed the days when they left him alone. 

Not really, not always. Just lately while the King was so smitten with this new boy. Merlin couldn't stand it. He wanted to scream out Mordred’s secrets and watch Arthur’s face fall, knowing that his precious little knight was something he so feared. 

Of course, seeing that face would mean Arthur would feel the same way about him, which was one of the major reasons that Merlin had been able to keep quiet at all. The other being he was very sure that while he didn’t trust him, and he didn’t like him, Merlin’s biggest frustration with Mordred was jealousy. 

He didn’t really understand Arthur’s thought process. It wasn’t as if Mordred was the best knight they had. And yes, he had saved Arthur’s life, but every one of his treasured favorite knights had done that one at least one occasion. Merlin had done it more time than he could count. It hadn’t gotten him an invite to the royal bed. Not even once. 

Was it because Mordred was beautiful? He wasn’t that beautiful. And while Arthur was very beautiful, and Gwen was very beautiful, Merlin knew that Arthur’s tastes were not only in the physical. He was a man who could see beyond mere beauty. Merlin looked back over at the table where young Mordred was entertaining everyone with a tale that was apparently hilarious (though Merlin doubted it.) 

Arthur could see past physical beauty, of course. But why would you bother if there was so much physical beauty around? Especially if you were a king. 

Merlin stood his perch, serving, cleaning up, constantly being reminded of his place by men who had no problem forgetting it while in the heat of battle or desire. Finally, the feast was over, and everyone started happily filing out, off to more rabble rousing at one of the pubs in town. Mordred held back, and Merlin’s stomach lurched as he approached. 

“Going down to town.” He said. 

“How lovely.” 

“You should come with.” 

“I think I’ll pass, thanks.” 

“Come on, Merlin.” 

“I, unlike some people, have an early morning.” 

“A few more hours won’t matter too much.” 

“For you, I’m sure.” Mordred sighed. 

“Never say I didn’t try, Merlin.” He said, walking fast to catch up with the others. 

*******************************************

“I think we’re still on the wrong foot.” Merlin didn’t want to talk to Mordred. Merlin never wanted to talk to Mordred, but there were a million chores going through his head at the moment and he really didn’t have time for another “let's be friends” chat. 

“Oh?” He asked, hoping that if he kept his responses monosyllabic, Mordred would get the hint and leave. 

“I’ve been trying to be nice to you, and you’re being a..a…”

“A what?” 

“A right pratt.” 

“No more than you are. Prancing around like you hold the keys to the kingdom.” 

“Don’t take it out on me that I’ve got my hands wrapped around the keys you were too much of a coward to grab.” 

“You don’t understand the difference between grabbing something and having it handed to you.” In a split second, Merlin crashed against the wall, Mordred’s hand around his throat. 

“Do you want to bet?” He asked. Merlin couldn’t speak. He couldn’t think. The only thing he could do was concentrate, levitating a large, heavy bronze plate from its stand. As it gained speed moving towards Mordred’s head, he put out his free hand and stopped it in its place, causing a loud crash that no one was around to hear. 

“I don’t know what you want from me.” Merlin managed to choke out. 

“I just want you to like me.” He said, letting go of his neck. 

“Well, I’m not going to.” Mordred might be Arthur’s flavor of the month, he might know Merlin’s secrets, but he didn’t have any right to his friendship because of that. 

“Is that how this is?” He asked. 

“That’s how it is.” 

“Don’t say I didn’t try, Merlin.” He said, walking away while the ambiguous threat hung in the air. 

 

*******************************************

Merlin had slept fine, knowing that something was going through Mordred’s stupid little head. He couldn’t risk telling Arthur, or anyone else, about his magic, lest Merlin reveal his own. They were locked in battle, and fairly well matched, save for the fact that Mordred definitely had the King’s eye in a way Merlin had never been able to catch. 

Mordred had no interest in revealing Merlin’s magic. He was much more petty, finding every excuse to volunteer Merlin for the worst tasks, suggesting him for the most annoying offices, and brazenly using magic in public to make Merlin seem even more clumsy than he was. 

After a few weeks of it, he was finished, too tired to continue pretending this little game of his wasn’t getting to him. He stormed into Mordred’s private chambers (what a nice little perk for being Arthur’s favorite) and waited for him to come in. He was giddy and drunk, but sobered up immediately when he saw Merlin waiting for him. 

“What are you doing here?” He asked. 

“Surrendering. I’m tired of this, Mordred.” 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” 

“You’re petty childish behavior. It bores me. And I’ve been listening to Arthur for years. I don’t bore easily.” 

“So what’s my prize for your defeat?” 

“How should I know what you want?” Mordred walked around Merlin, staring him down, finally sitting on the bed. 

“Isn’t it obvious?” Merlin rolled his eyes. The very idea that Mordred was coming on to him was laughable.

“You can’t be serious.”

“Why not?” 

“You’ve got Arthur in your bed, you’ve got any of the other knights at your beck and call, you can bat your eyelashes and have any woman in the court, why would you bother with me?” Mordred pulled him to the bed. 

“Because, you don’t want me.” He pulled him in for a kiss, and it was equal parts disgusting and arousing. Merlin hated himself for the way his prick perked up while Mordred’s lips were on his. He pulled Merlin on top of him and didn’t stop kissing. “Don’t tell me you’ve never thought of it.” he grabbed one of Merlin’s wrists, and the sheer power of Mordred’s desire coursed through Merlin’s veins. “What would it be like.” He pushed Merlin down. “The two of us, with all this.” His eyes were glowing now, and Merlin hated to admit it, but there was something...soothing...about being so close to one of his own kind. 

Mordred understood him in a way no one he’d ever known could. Mordred matched him in a way that scared and excited him. He was a right little git who was currently the apple of his master’s eye. But he was handsome, and he was eager, and he was begging for it. 

Merlin swiveled below Mordred, and quickly overtook him. With his hands pushing down on Mordred’s wrists, Merlin smiled, knowing full well that his eyes were glowing golden just as deep as Mordred’s. 

“Yes.” He said, squeezing just a little harder to see what Mordred’s reaction would be, and not disappointed by the tiny wince he had caused. “What would that be like?” His mouth crashed onto Mordred’s, forcing his tongue between his lips and teeth. He pressed his hips down, feeling Mordred’s excitement throbbing against him. 

There was a part of Merlin that hated himself at that moment, but it was quickly drowned out by arousal as Mordred pulled his trousers down, slipped his hand between their bodies, and grabbed Merlin’s prick. 

Merlin moaned as Mordred slid his hand up and down his shaft. He knew that the boy had done something to him, because no one’s hands could be that soft, but he didn’t care. Whatever tricks Mordred wanted to play, Merlin was going to take. 

He bit down on Mordred’s lip, it took all he had in him not to draw blood. Merlin felt a pang of guilt as he realized how desperately he wanted to see Mordred bleeding, beaten, bruised. It wasn’t like him to feel so strongly or so violently while he was aroused. It wasn’t the sort of man he liked to think he was. 

It also wasn’t something he cared to analyze. He was going to get through this and go on with his life, hopefully with much less of Mordred’s meddling. 

Mordred was doing too good a job with Merlin’s prick, and he certainly didn’t want to have to wait for a second go around, so he pulled his hand up. There was thick layer of slick over it and when he looked up at Mordred, who gave him a sheepish grin. 

“What’s the point of having a gift if you don’t use it?” 

“Hope you don’t use that on Arthur.” 

“Only when he can’t see.” Merlin wished he hadn’t asked. He didn’t want the image of them fucking in his head while he did this. “Stop thinking.” 

“That’s easy for you to say. You aren’t required to think.” 

“Alright, then think about how jealous Arthur would be if he saw you like this.” Merlin stood up, and pulled one of Mordred’s arms until he was flipped onto his stomach. 

“Or, we could stop talking altogether.” He said. In what must have been the biggest feat of his entire life, Mordred stayed quiet, not making another sound until Merlin has finished roughly pulling down his trousers and stuck a finger inside of him. At first, only a tiny whimper escapes his mouth, but by the time Merlin has two fingers inside him, Mordred is all throaty moans and rolling hips, greedy thrusts and pleads for more. When Merlin has had enough of Mordred’s begging, he lines up his still slick prick and pushes inside with more force than he would normally use. 

He’s easy work from then, a few well placed thrusts, a hand pulling the back of Mordred’s hair while the other digs into his hip hard enough to leave bruises that he would have to make a note of and conceal before the next time Mordred was summoned for Arthur’s entertainment. 

The thought angered Merlin so much that he lost control of his thrusting, pushing harder, deeper while his hands grasped tighter. Mordred took it all in stride. This was nothing he couldn’t handle, providing Merlin was still letting him breathe, which, occasionally, he was.

Merlin found the right spot, felt Mordred seize up in some form of pleasure, and he hammered the spot until Mordred moaned, whined and sighed into climax. Once it was over, Merlin pulled out, wrapped his hand around his own prick, and finished himself off, white stripes falling over Mordred’s back. 

He stood up, pulled on his trousers, and pressed his fingers into the already purple bruises on Mordred’s hips. He mumbled an incantation over them, and they were instantly gone. Well, not gone, but only a handful of people, himself, Mordred, perhaps Gauis (though it would be an interesting question to find out why Gauis would be in a situation where he would find them) would be able to see them. Since Arthur wasn’t one of those people, and Mordred would most likely be able to walk in the morning, Merlin wasn’t going to bother with any deeper cleaning of his mess. Let the marks heal on their own time. If Arthur wanted him before they were gone, Mordred could certainly grin and bear it. 

“Are we square, Sir?” Merlin asked. He was already walking towards the door. Mordred looked up at him, his eyes calm, his lips still red and his hair a tousled mess. He doesn’t want to reveal to Merlin how hoarse his voice was, so he only stared at the man and nodded.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just want to say about the magical lube... these are two people with a lot of magic, they could have done /anything/ literally. I am going to pat myself on the back for being able to reign in scene with such abundant (and cracky) possibilities.
> 
> It kinda feels like this story is getting a shockingly low amount of readers. Perhaps I'm not tagging correctly, or this fandom is really less interested in Merlin if he's not with Arthur (it's coming) Or maybe it's simply not that good. 
> 
> You have to write for yourself, I suppose. But thank you for everyone who is reading. I hope it's enjoyable, even if only for a few people!


	5. Sir Gwaine

“Alright.” Gwaine said, his eyes still wide with the shock he’d had the very first sentence Merlin had uttered. “I wasn’t really looking for your entire sexual history, but… thanks.” 

“I thought you might want to know before.. you know.” Merlin said. They were friends, they were attractive, and they were going to give this a shot. Afterall, why wouldn’t you sleep with your friends? At least, why wouldn’t you when you’d exhausted all your other options, and were currently stuck in the castle in a slow adventure season, with nothing better to do. 

It did make some sense though. It’s not like either of them had anyone to stay true to. It wasn’t as if anyone was going to be missing either of them if they stowed away after dinner for a few hours. And it wasn’t as if they didn’t enjoy each other’s company. This was a good plan, a win-win for both of them. 

“I only meant, you should tell me if you’d been with anyone you shouldn’t have.” 

“I’ve only been with people I shouldn’t have.” 

“Yeah, but… it’s not like you should be embarrassed about any of them. Well… maybe that last one. But mostly you have good taste, wouldn’t you say?”

“I don’t know what I’d say.” Merlin moved in closer to Gwaine. “Afterall, it’s taken me this long to get to you.” Gwaine laughed. Flattery would get you everywhere with Gwaine.

“Well, we’re all allowed a mistake from time to time.” Gwaine said, pulling Merlin in for a kiss. Merlin had no idea how much he would enjoy being between Gwaine’s arms, how much safer he felt. It wasn’t that he couldn’t take care of himself. He could take care of a lot more than that. But, between Gwaine’s arms, all of those responsibilities and anxieties melted away. 

Merlin felt like just himself- like that was all he needed to be, lips pressed against Gwaine, who was always himself. Things escalated rather quickly, soft caresses and kisses that made their clothes fall to the floor in record time. But nothing felt rushed. Inside the bubble of their passion, everything moved at a comfortable pace. 

He didn’t know exactly how it happened, but Gwaine had somehow found a way to naturally situate Merlin onto all fours. Merlin didn’t care, he had put his trust into Gwaine’s hands long before this moment. Gwaine always made sure that this trust was never broken, and he didn’t screw that up now, as he moved his head down Merlin’s back, planting loving kisses here and there, until he reached the curve of Merlin’s arse, and pressed on. Every kiss down was harder, Gwaine moved his hands around both cheeks, squeezing flirtatiously before gently pulling them apart. 

He paused for a second, his breath hot and damp, thrilling when it landed on Merlin’s hole. Then, he dove in with gusto, his tongue darting inside intermittently, then pulling out, lapping up the area, alternating at a pace Merlin couldn’t track because it was making him so dizzy. Gwaine was enjoying himself, enjoying the reaction he was getting out of Merlin, but he didn’t want to give him too much of a good thing. At least, not yet. 

Ignoring the sad whimper from Merlin, Gwaine pulled away so he could press two of his fingers first into his mouth, and then into Merlin, who moaned with the entry, and rocked unashamedly back to take Gwaine’s fingers all the way in. He let Merlin set the pace for as long as he could, then wrapped his free hand around his prick, stroking while Merlin continued to rock. 

“Gwaine...please.” He asked. 

“Please what?” Hearing it was half the fun. 

“Please fuck me.” Merlin begged. And Gwaine didn’t know a person who could say no to that. (Apparently, according to a recent and very long confession from Merlin, this was quite literally true for him, as well.)

Gwaine did what he always did in these situations. Stood up, spit on his hand, and rubbed himself before slowly entering. He enjoyed every second of this as he slid inch by inch inside of Merlin. When he finally bottomed out, he let out a noise somewhere between a sigh and a grunt, and quickly found Merlin’s hips to hold onto. 

He easily found the spots that made Merlin dizzy with pleasure, noted them, and then started fucking him in earnest. Merlin hadn’t been fucked like this in ages, and he was enjoying it, the way Gwaine’s fingers felt gripping him, the way his thrusts pushed Merlin so his head bobbed up and down. The way Arthur looked from the doorway. 

Wait...WHAT? Merlin shook his head and saw exactly what he’d thought. Arthur standing in the doorway. There was silence and it was only right to wait for the King to say something. 

“I was looking for Gwaine. I...You know I could have you hung for this?” This seemed like a very hypocritical threat considering. But nonetheless, it was technically true. Gwaine saved Merlin by speaking up first. 

“Well, at the moment, Merlin here’s having me hung. So I’m afraid you’ll have to wait, Sire.” He smacked Merlin on the arse and Merlin looked away in embarrassment. The three of them waited another excruciating moment. Arthur finally spoke. “I appreciate the situation you’re in.”   
Gwaine started again. “And I, as always, am at your service, my Lord. But, as Merlin is currently at my service, I beg you kindly give us a few minutes.” Arthur had nothing better to say. It was a surreal situation to be in, but Gwaine made a fair point so he nodded and began to turn back. As he opened the door. “Unless…” Arthur turned back around. “You’d prefer to stay and watch?” 

Merlin’s jaw nearly dropped to the ground, and he was too ashamed to even look at Arthur. No wonder he’d never made it to the place Mordred currently held in his Arthur’s bed. He was mortified by what Arthur thought of him. How would Merlin have ever been able make a move on him?

“Alright.” He heard Arthur say as he pulled up a chair a few feet away. He sat down, and Merlin looked up at Gwaine, who seemed unaffected. Of course he was unaffected, this was not the first time he had had an audience, Merlin knew. His fingers danced softly against the pale skin of Merlin’s back, and within a minute, Gwaine had brought him back into the rhythm of it all. 

For a few moments, as Gwaine coaxed him higher into bliss, Merlin was able to forget that Arthur, the man he had desired for so long he could barely count, was even there. Then, he’d heard a moan that wasn’t his own, or Gwaine’s, and he was pulled back into the room, back into the surreal experience that was apparently reality. He looked over to the chair where Arthur sat, and saw the king with his hand around his prick. 

Merlin tried to concentrate on Gwaine, the way he was thrusting and throbbing he was sure they were both nearly about to finish, but even Gwaine was looking over at Arthur, so Merlin was sure he would be forgiven if he took the opportunity to stare- just momentarily- at the member he’d spent so many nights dreaming about. 

He was already jealous of Mordred, still the favored, still the boy who could place his body against Arthur’s any time he wanted. But now he was jealous of the king’s own hand, because Merlin would give anything at that moment to know what it felt like to hold him. 

Merlin moaned, there was no way for the others to know it was for the wrong reason, and it set off a chain reaction. First Gwaine spilled warm and full inside of Merlin, then Arthur spilled over his hand, the sight of which caused Merlin to spill, too. 

Gwaine pulled out and dragged Merlin off his knees, wrapping his arms around him, and resting his head on the crook of Merlin’s neck. Merlin wondered if he had imagined the king looking intently at his prick. He must have.

“I believe you said you needed me, Sire?” Gwaine asked. Arthur quickly stood up and righted his clothes. 

“Nothing that can’t wait until morning.” He said, and made a hasty exit.

Merlin watched the door for minutes after Arthur left, not sure if he wanted him to come back or not. Gwaine wrapped his arms around Merlin tighter, pulled him to his chest. 

“You don’t have to worry ‘bout him, you know that, don’t you?” 

“Sure.” Merlin said. Gwaine knew he hadn’t really calmed his nerves. But he only held his friend tight, and hoped that he knew he cared all the same.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Merlin keeps on mentioning Mordred and Arthur. I feel a little bad that there are only mentions and no scenes. But no one's mentioned that its something worth exploring, so I just have to assume it's not really very popular.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took me so long.

“Merlin?” Merlin had been avoiding Arthur all week. Well, avoiding as much as possible considering Arthur basically owned him. He had just been mortified, terrified of what Arthur must think of him now. 

“Yes?”

“I need to see you tonight.” 

“You’re seeing me right now.” 

“That’s not what I... I need you to come to my chambers at nightfall.” 

“Of course, Sire.” Merlin had no idea what was going on, but his thoughts immediately jumped to the very best, as well as the very worst, possibilities. 

*******************************************

“Where is the queen?” Was the only thing Merlin could think to say. 

“With someone you know well.” 

“I know a lot of people well.” 

“Apparently. I suspect she does too.” 

“What did you need to see me for?” 

“I’ll get to that in good time, Merlin. For now, help me undress.” The king knew how to undress. And he’d known for many years past when he had requested Merlin continue doing it. But he had long since grown tired of annoying Merlin with this unnecessary request so it wasn’t part of their normal routine any longer. 

Merlin didn’t question it, simply went about the task he had memorized the steps to so many years ago. After he’d pulled Arthur’s shirt over his head, and placed that over a chair, Arthur stopped him. 

“That will do.” He said, sitting on the bed. He motioned to Merlin. “Come, sit with me.” Merlin had spent countless hours in Arthur’s room- since Arthur had been just a knight himself, but even when he was completely alone in the room, he had never dared to sit on Arthur’s bed. He did as requested now under Arthur’s watchful eye. 

“Comfy.” He said with a goofy grin on his face. 

“The other night, with Gwaine.” Merlin went red. There were about a million ways this conversation could go. And all of them seemed scary at the moment. 

“Um… yes?”

“I have questions for you, but I don’t want anything we discuss falling on anyone else’s ears.” 

“Of course, my lord.” 

“Even Gwaine’s?”

“Especially Gwaine’s. Anything that touches Gwaine’s ears runs straight out of his lips.” 

“Indeed.” Arthur and Merlin sat in silence. “Merlin, are you and Gwaine...an item?” 

“Don’t you think you’d know about it if we were?” 

“What makes you think I would?” He had no right to think it, but Merlin had spent so much of his life ensuring that every aspect of Arthur’s life was as comfortable as possible. He had just assumed that Arthur knew a little bit about his life. It stung to hear him now knowing otherwise. 

“You wouldn’t, of course. Plenty of more important things to think about.” Merlin said, hoping that his smile masked the silly pain he was in. 

“I didn’t mean you to think you weren’t important, Merlin. I just thought… after Leon… you had learned to be a bit more discreet.” 

“Discreet isn’t really my strong suit, Sire.”

“Of course.” Arthur laughed. “I can’t even imagine you keeping a secret.” If he only knew. For the millionth time, Merlin craved confession, would do anything if he could just tell Arthur the secret he had been holding from him for years.

“I don’t know about that, Arthur. I mean, give me a little credit. If the occasion calls for it, I can be quiet.” 

“Can you?” Arthur asked. There was something raspy in his voice. This conversation had changed in an instant. Suddenly, the king’s sun shone warm and bright over Merlin. He wanted to pinch himself, he couldn’t believe it was happening. 

“As a mouse.” He promised, gulping down his fear and excitement as Arthur’s fingers grazed his hand. 

“Merlin, I don’t know if I understand you.”

“I don’t think of myself as hard to understand.” 

“Oh, you are. The rest of them...I can define with a word, and I can do it in a heartbeat.” The rest of them? Did he consider Merlin on the same level as his knights? “But you’ve never been clear to me.” 

“Some one’s got to keep you on your toes.” In a move he didn’t expect, but had desperately craved for years, Arthur pushed his chest against Merlin’s, his mouth so close he could almost taste it. 

“Indeed.” Arthur said before finally pressing their lips together. 

Merlin had been dreaming of this moment for longer than he could remember, even in the beginning, when he couldn’t stand him, he had recognized the deep physical attraction he felt for the dollop-headed prince. But all those fantasies had been abstract, he’d known what would happen in his mind, but the taste of it, the feel of it, the pure visceral bliss of it, was something even his massive imagination couldn’t truly comprehend. 

As Arthur slid his tongue into Merlin’s mouth, a million questions passed through his mind. What did this mean? Did Arthur have any idea about how much Merlin pined for him, or had Gwaine’s invitation made him crave just a taste? Had Arthur run through his favorite knights and simply need someone to distract him while the queen was otherwise indisposed? Was this all some cruel joke? Merlin pushed every insecurity away and concentrated on the King’s lips. Whatever was happening, he finally had those lips on his.

And then, they were gone. 

Was that it? Was that all he had wanted? Merlin tried to be happy with the tiny taste he had received from Arthur. Then, he felt those lips on his neck, and at the same time, Arthur pulling down his pants. He moved fast. Merlin needed to get his head in the game and catch, so he moved his own hand onto Arthur’s belt, opening it like he had a million times before, only now the King’s hand was on his prick, and their lips were back together, and Merlin still wasn’t quite sure this was real, not another elaborate fantasy. 

Then Arthur pulled away, looked into Merlin’s eyes, and he knew it had to be real. They kissed again, and Arthur moved his lips lower, past his neck, nuzzling the rough fabric on his shirt as he pressed his cheek against Merlin’s stomach, lower still, until Merlin’s pants were gone and his lips were around his cock. 

Merlin almost fell off the bed. On the floor, right below him, Arthur was sucking him off. Which was going to be a quick job indeed if he didn’t pull himself together. Just as soon as he’d gotten his wits back, he felt Arthur’s hand cupping his balls and the sound he made made Arthur stop and look up. 

“Alright, Merlin?” He asked. 

“Ah..Of course, Sire.” Arthur stroked up on Merlin’s prick. 

“Just Arthur, for the moment.” He said, and then swallowed down Merlin so fast he didn’t know if he was going to last another second. He grabbed Arthur by the hair and pulled, hard. 

Arthur pulled off and looked up at him quixotically. 

“Sorry Sire- Arthur. I… I forgot where I was for a minute.” Arthur slid up Merlin’s body. 

“Can’t have that.” he said before pressing his lips against Merlin’s. 

Merlin didn’t see how this was going to make things any better- his own flavour mixed with that of Arthur’s lips, he didn’t think he would ever taste anything half as perfect in as many years as he lived. He grabbed Arthur by the back of the neck, feverishly pulling him in for more. 

He heard Arthur moan against his lips, so he brought his free hand to the king’s hip, pulled their bodies closer together. In that moment, he lived for their embrace, no matter how short that embrace would last. 

They finally climbed into the bed, he tried not to think about the fact that this was the bed he shared with Gwen. 

“I know what you’re thinking, Merlin.” Of course he did. “And don’t lose any tears over what Gwen’s missing. It isn’t anything worse than what happens when I’m away.” 

There had to be nothing but positivity between them tonight. Arthur wasn’t going to abide by Merlin’s unnecessary feelings of guilt. He waited until Merlin nodded. 

“Of course.” He said, swallowing the thought, which was easy when Arthur took his hand and put it right on his own cock. Merlin’s fingers suddenly felt on fire with the heat of the king’s prick between them. He slowly started moving. 

“You don’t have to be so soft,” Arthur whispered into Merlin’s ear. “It’s not going to fall off.” 

Merlin looked at him, and Arthur smiled. Who knew he had anything resembling a joke in his repertoire? Merlin kissed him as he gripped and pulled harder. After a few minutes of kissing and mutual jerking, Arthur was begging for more- literally. Merlin could think of no more beautiful sounds than the words “Merlin, please” from Arthur’s lips. 

He finally felt like a servant- in the fact that his one and only desire was that Arthur not want for anything- so he kissed him, then started to turn around. 

Arthur grabbed him by the hip. 

“Where are you going?” he asked. 

“I thought you wanted my…” Arthur laughed, then kissed him. 

“No, no, no.” He said as he started to turn onto to his stomach. “Serve your king.” 

Merlin had to take a second to process the situation he was, er, entering. 

“I thought you said you wanted me to call you Arthur now.” 

“You’ll be screaming it soon enough, Merlin.” And he had no doubt that Arthur was right. Merlin wouldn’t deny his desire for this. He felt his hand run down the king’s back until he met the cleft of his unfairly gorgeous ass. 

He moved his fingers between the cheeks, and guiltily used the same trick Mordred had shown him to create a slickness on the two he slid inside Arthur. 

Merlin heard Arthur sigh, and he had to catch his breath himself, he was completely drunk on the way his fingers felt inside of him. For a second he mentally pouted at the fact that his sex life was basically over after tonight- how could anything in the world ever feel this good again?

“Merlin.” Arthur pulled him out of the cloud he had drifted off on as his fingers luxuriated inside him. “Why are you stalling?”   
“I didn’t realize I was.” 

“I’ve seen what you’ve got. And I want you to give it to me.” 

“Anything you want, Sire.” Merlin aligned himself against Arthur’s ready hole. 

“I told you to call me Arthur.” He reminded Merlin. 

“So sorry, Arthur.” Merlin said, and then he breached the king and nothing in his life would be the same again. 

Because, even if Arthur sent him away the second they were done, even if they never spoke of this again, Merlin had finally conquered his craving. He held Arthur’s hips as he pushed deeper, each thrust eliciting the most intoxicating sound of all- Arthur’s moan. 

It shouldn’t have been so easy to make the king come- but Merlin had been studying Arthur for years, knew what he wanted before even he did and expertly brought him to the best orgasm he had ever had. 

“More.” Arthur begged, and Merlin was happy to oblige, pushing hard, deeper, sure that he was giving Arthur bruises, that walking would be hard in the morning, and sitting absolute torture. “Tell me you’re going to come.” 

“Is that what you want?” Merlin asked. 

“Yes. Please.” 

Merlin almost faltered there. Had Arthur just said please to him? It didn’t seem possible. 

“Please, Merlin, Please.” And that was all that he needed. His fingers dug deeper into Arthur’s skin, he heard his voice, screaming Arthur so loudly that he was sure Gwen and Leon could hear it across the castle and not giving a damn. 

He nearly passed out, falling onto Arthur’s back and resting the side of his face on one of his broad shoulders, dreading the inevitable dismount. 

They stayed there for a minute, Arthur closed his eyes, never feeling better, more full in his life. Merlin listened to Arthur’s breath, feeling the inhales bring him slightly higher on the bed. Eventually, he had to move, or he was going to fall asleep ontop of Arthur. 

But when Merlin moved off him, he heard something unbelievable- Arthur whining. 

“What are you doing?” He asked as Merlin started looking for his clothes.   
“Going to sleep.” 

“Sleep here.” 

“I wouldn’t want to bother you.” 

“Merlin, that wasn’t an offer, it was an order.” 

Merlin wasn’t one to go against Arthur’s orders. Well, he was, but not when it was something he wanted to do. 

In the morning, he woke up with the sun in his eyes and Arthur’s arm slung across his waist. Merlin’s stirring didn’t seem to rouse Arthur, so he closed his eyes and went back to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fingers crossed you enjoyed!


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